At McSweeney’s, famous authors are rewriting the funny pages:
“It’s a mighty sorry business, Sarge being blown up like that,” Beetle said. The other soldiers in the café nodded silently. He ordered another bottle of vermouth and drank the vermouth. It was a good vermouth.
That’s Papa doing Beetle Bailey. Also: Jane Austen does Peanuts, and James Joyce revises Garfield. I tried my own:
The legend of Calvin! In this legend we have a suburban boy, Calvin, conqueror of worlds mostly internal. Our Hero sits atop his Mt. Olympus, staring down with the other Gods at a steep slope of briars and oaks and a tiny path just wide enough to guide a blood red wagon…and it was blood red. The Adventurer! The King Of His And Every World! The Last Man Worth Not Just His Salt But All The Damn Salt In All The World’s Seven Damn Seas! He grabbed the black mono-handle on his Radio Flyer and something changed. His parents never understood it. Neither did Hobbes, really…no on could, save The Legend himself. VROOOOM! He was off with a kick and without a look left or right – The Legend heeded no rules. VRIIIIIIIM! He hit the lip over the sidewalk and – Whoosh! – he was off. The Legend lived!
Hopefully you got the comic. Author guesses encouraged in the comments (or, for the answer, just highlight the line below).
Answer here:Tom Wolfe
Oh, and I really would love to see you create your own. In the comments.